I've done a lot of weddings in my 15 (yikes) years as a Pastor. I'm estimating that I've done around 40 weddings now. Along with those weddings comes an awful lot of pre-marital counseling. Here are three red flags that I've come across during my pre-marital counseling sessions.
- We want to keep our finances seperate. I'm not saying that this arrangement can't work. But regardless of any financial wisdom in such an arrangement - the relational message that it sends is divisive.
- We've never had an argument. If a couple gets to their wedding day and hasn't had an argument yet - they're not ready to be married. You have to know that your partner can fight fair before you commit the rest of your life to them.
- Once we get married he/she will change this behavior that I don't like. I'm amazed that really smart people actually think this will happen. Read my lips - nothing gets easier after you're married. If it's bad now - it will get worse (not better) after you get married. Marriage is an amazing gift, but it takes tremendous commitment and hard work to make it great.